


Wanting More

by morrishwelcrrll



Category: Good Girls (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Happy Ending, Multi, character injury, idiots who love each other but won’t say, messy relationship, really talking
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-02
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:41:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27843157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/morrishwelcrrll/pseuds/morrishwelcrrll
Summary: Just two being idiots.
Relationships: Beth Boland & Rhea, Beth Boland/Rio, Beth Boland/Ruby Hill/Annie Marks
Comments: 2
Kudos: 52





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hiii, i hope you guys like it!! English is not my first language, so apologize in advance for mistakes.

It’s supposed to be just one more night, they had a meting to see the books and a new partner to do business with. She wasn’t supposed to be there, but she had almost got in front of his car so he would take her, not that he was happy about it but she still gets what she wants sometimes even in different times like this, when he hated her a bit more, and he wasn’t shy about it, treating her almost every day.

It didn’t have 10 minutes they were there and the warehouse was in chaos, guns pointed at every one and the bang they made was so loud she could barely hear Rio by her side screaming something at her while dragging her with such force she knew later his fingers were going to be marked in her arm. She didn’t even saw what happened or who had dragged the gun first, before she was being pushed against the nearest wall, with a full killing mood Rio. 

\- Are you okay? – he asked a few minutes in the road, her head is pounding from the intense noise and the fear she was still feeling tingling in her pink skin. 

\- Yeah. - it’s above a whisper, and she knows he is looking at her but she can fell her left side hurting from the impact on the wall, can fell her hips constricting in her jeans, it fucking hurts, but she’ll keep it to herself, and his sill closed face tells her the best is to ignore. 

When they stop by her house the car is still on, and is exactly what she needs, to know that he isn’t doing the confort thing tonight the same she remembers he did a few months back, when things were normal in the means of them. 

\- Goodbye Elizabeth. - there’s something different in his voice, and when she just exits the car and looks at him with the help of the street lights she sees something in his eyes that just makes the felling in her stomach wake, and she knows what’s he’s doing, he’s pushing her away. 

\- We gonna meet tomorrow? – she asks just to make sure her voice is still there, and that he isn’t going anywhere again, because she made peace with herself, she knows what they are now, knows he will come to collect, and she’s okay with it. 

\- Uhm... yeah. – he hums, but doesn’t look at her, and when she can think of something to say other then the pain in her side and the look he was giving her he is already gone. 

On the course of the week she try’s calling, sending texts, and she gets nothing in return, not even an acknowledgement that he is still there and running like he says. So she takes care of her kids and waits for their meting on Monday night, even if he doesn’t come she knows he will send Mick or someone. 

But then is Monday almost eleven pm and no one shows up, and she’s sitting there like an idiot, pissed not only at him but at herself too, for thinking that he would have the decency to call or text letting her know. She expects till Wednesday to go crashing at the bar in fury. And to her surprise there’s no one there, even the bartender is different, the guy says he doesn’t even know who she’s talking about, and is an understatement to say she is beyond stressed out and fucking pissed at him. What if she...needed him? Something had happened to his business like he liked to call. 

She’s almost giving up when she sees a bald tattooed head going to the back exit, and that’s her cue to grab her bag and run to him. 

\- Mick! Wait. – she’s almost screaming when she sees him stop and take a deep breath like she was something he had to prepare himself too. - What’s going on? I’m trying to call and text for almost two weeks know! - she’s breathless and talking to fast having to slow down when she comes to a stop in front of him. 

\- Boss didn’t say? – he’s calm and collected like she was boring him. - He’s out, you girls good to keep running the business alone. – he says truly bored of her, and she can’t get a word of what he said. What does he mean with “he’s out”? Out of what exactly? 

\- So he’s in a trip or something? When he’s coming back? – and the look he gives her can only be described has pity. 

\- Nah, he’s out the game, won’t be running with you guys again. – and she’s? Shocked? Hurt? He didn’t have the decency to say that to her? Afraid he’s going to kill her know? 

\- What? Where’s him? I wanna see him! – she needs to talk to him. Was that some short of game? Was he playing with her? Maybe a test? What the actual fuck was going on. 

\- That won’t be happening. – he shrugged his shoulders and started to turn back again. 

\- No! I wanna see him! What’s he doing? Is that some sick test i have to pass? – she was losing her already lost cool, so it was better for him and everyone if he just say where the fuck he is. – What the fuck is this? And Where the fuck is him? – she yelled. 

\- Laddy... – he shook his head looking at her. 

\- Mick please, i’m not understanding anything here! Let me talk to him! – she needed to yell at him too. 

\- Get in the car. – he just gave up, and she knew she was getting her way out of tiredness. 

It was a drive of 40 minutes, the fuck was happening for him to be so away from the town. Her mind was racing a mile a minute when the car finally came to a stop in front of a tall building. 

\- What is this? He’s living here know? – she asked pooping out of the car behind Mick. 

\- Yeah. – it was all he said. She really wasn’t getting anything, was all that just a game? To get her killed? Mick in the bar and the non sense they were making? 

The first thing she saw when they entered the building was the receptionist in white, was this a hospital? What was he doing in a hospital? Had him get hurt? The hit? No that was over she had canceled on him, what was he doing here? 

She looked at Mick searching for an answer and all she got was his shrugged shoulders as he walked right past the reception and into the elevator. Fuck, she was getting even more franatic under her own skin. It was the longest 12 stores up she had ever been. 

\- Hey everything okay? – some guy standing by the only dor ahead of her asked mick looking at her from bottom to top. 

\- Yeah, yeah, just his girl. – his what? She was already to chocked to acknowledge him or whatever they were saying. 

Mick stoped right beside the dor nodding for her to go ahead while he sat in the chairs at what looked like the same reception the entrance of the building has, with the exception that they were the only ones in there, her, mick and the guy who looked like an doctor or whatever. 

Her heart was so loud in her ears, she couldn’t even hear her thoughts. Scared was nothing to how she was feeling, all the things at once that’s for sure. And the view she came to did nothing to calm her down, to easy her loud heart. Rio laying in a bed surrounded by monitors and beeps she couldn’t hold her gasp, her blurry eyes. 

\- I’m thirsty... – his voice was hoarse, but at least he was talk, and that could only tell her he was fine, right? No, definitely not, her eyes were already full of tears. – Mick? – he was turned to the other side, back to her, hiding his face, hiding her face from him, cause she knew he would be beyond pissed. 

\- He’s not... – her voice sounded ruined to her own ears, imagine his. It was like his whole body had closed up, tensed at her voice, and she just, she just was so sorry, and didn’t even know why. 

\- What’re you doing here? – he turned his body looking straight at her, letting her see him, his side body patched, the side she did it. – Get out. – his eyes were so hard on her, like she was the latest thing he wanted to see, and she probably was. 

\- I... what... do you.. water. – she wasn’t making any sense and she knew it, she just couldn’t assimilate what was happening, what had happened. 

\- Get out! – his voice was loud now, and she almost did get out, but she just couldn’t, her body was frozen there. 

\- What happened? – it was above a whisper but she had manage to put something out of her mouth other then the loud breathing she was doing to calm herself. 

\- Nothing, now get out! – he wasn’t having her, and it was clear that he wasn’t totally fine when she had manage her breathing, and her gaze on him, he had lost weight, and was so, so pale. 

\- Rio... – she knew the effect his name coming out of her mouth had on him, and she wanted to know what the fuck happened to him, so yeah, she was gonna use whatever she had on him. – Why... did some job gone wrong? – and he genuinely laughed, looking right at her, that ugly laugh he reserved for her when trying to intimidade. 

\- Yeah... apparently your little stunt on my lung messed things up... so yeah a job gone wrong and you shoot me, and i’m still paying the price. – she knew her face was now covered in tears, and the dismissive look he gave her turning his head to the other side had done the job to finish her strong grip in herself, letting all the tears fall down, letting her body swell in the pain she was seeing in his body, the pain he was still felling. – Now get out. – what could she do? What she did was the reason he was here now, and the image of him lying on that floor choking on his own blood was all over her head, and she just, she was so sorry, so sorry. 

\- Please... – she knew her whole body was shivering and trembling, and him once again hurt that badly like that was her fault, she had shoot him, and he was hurting, all those months, all this time he was hiding his pain from her, she never thought what had happened to him that day, or the days that had come, and now she knew. 

\- Leave Elizabeth. – his voice sounded tired, and the beeping sound of the monitors was getting loud and she couldn’t hear exactly what was going on, and it felt like minutes since he told her to get out, when the beep was to loud and there was someone yelling at her and going over him and she doesn’t know exactly how she was now sitting outside of the room with a not so happy Mick looking at her while she tried to breathe and not pass out from the nausea she was feeling. 

Her head was pounding so much it hurt her eyes to stay open, was he okay? Was she okay? She never expected to come here and find him like that, finding him hurt and because of her, what was she doing? What were they doing? How could he hide that from her? Even... even when he had bend her over that office table a few months ago in the first time they had touched after everything and he... he just seemed fine, incredibly fine even. 

\- You have to breathe . – she looked up seeing Mick leaning over her with a water that she doesn’t even remember him moving to get. – Drink, come on. – he almost pushed the water in her face making her take the cup. 

\- Is he? – her voice sounded so hoarse, she really needed to drink, to push the nausea and the pain and all back in. 

\- He’s fine, now drink. – and she did, what else could she do? Other than her plan of crying herself to sleep some time in the night. 

Once again she’s losing track of time, this whole day seems like a fog in her mind, in her body. She was thinking so hard on that day, the day she hated her most, the day she hated him most, that she had lost track of the night coming and the new voices that were coming from some place by her side maybe? She had to look up and dry her face from the fat tears looking right up to Rhea and Marcus walking to her, the way her stomach had made her dive right back down pouring her guts out in the trash right at her feet (probably Micks job), was definitely a gave in even for her. 

\- Shit, you good? – there was a hand at her hair and other at her leg, an expectant Marcus looked at her with shiny and worried eyes while she knew Rhea was the one holding her hair. 

\- Sorry... – she was still so fucking sick, she had to take some deep breath’s to stop herself from pukin again. 

\- You okay Miss Beth? – asked Marcus just making her wanting to cry even more present. 

-Yes Marcus, thank you. – she smiled at him forcing herself to swallow everything down just like she was great at. 

-You came to see my daddy too? – she was going to trow up again, for her relief Rhea asked Mick to let Marcus in the room that she was going right in, letting her turn her head away closing her eyes to keep the felling at bay. 

-Does he know? – and she should have predicted it after all Rhea was a mother too. But she didn’t wanted to acknowledge that, not now at least, so she just shook her head keeping it down, eyes closed, ignoring the burning look she was receiving. 

-He’s not gonna believe it. – and could she blame him? Should him believe her? She doesn’t think so. 

\- You already faked it once...i’m not even surprised that this happened between you two after what you did. – the point was valid and it was even more things for him to trow at her face. – But he’s stupid for you, so yeah, he will after some time. – how could she say that, he was laying there because of her, and yeah maybe he was stupid for her but she was just has stupid for thinking that things could be okay, that he was okay. 

\- I’m sorry. – she didn’t even looked to Rhea, she was just sorry, fucking sorry for putting him there, for letting things go so far, for getting herself pregnant of the man she shoot and hated her. – I really am. – she finally looked up, receiving a little nod from Rhea. Nothing was okay, but she got her, Rio was not a easy person to deal, he had done some wrong choices, and even more wrongs investments, and Beth happened to be in the way of his inability to talk and be a human. 

-You should go home. – yes, it was what she was gonna do, Rio didn’t wanted to see her face, and she was sure that going through all that again wasn’t going to do any good at any of them, so she was gonna go home, and came back tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that, and every day until he leaves that bed and they can talk about the little thing growing inside of her for a fell months now, and she was gonna try day after day until she fells less guilt, until he lets her in. 

She can hear Rio and Marcus on her way out, can fell her heart squeeze even more in her chest, it was all so hard on her, she was still addressing everything that had happened. Mick couldn’t take her, had to stay there, so he asked an uber on Rios name, she gave Mick a little nod before entering the car and once more fell her eyes wheeling up.

It was the same longe 40 minutes drive until she was home, and the sorrow and tiredness she was feeling only intensified with the promise of her bed. For her relief Dean was with the kids in his new house, another relief she had, him gone. She got in and started taking all her clothes, it smelled like hospital, like him, like that night. 

She felt so tired, it hurt her soul the way she kept seeing him there, with all those monitors around him, with that pale face and lean body, she had done that, and she never would’ve thought he could look less than powerful, less than all the things he always were in front of her. 

The feelings had to stop, she wasn’t like that, she never cried, she wasn’t a emotional person, and here she was, trying hard not to cry herself to oblivion over something she had no control over. Something the two of then had come to, he had pressed her to do it, had yelled, and terrified her, made her emotional, and everything had gone to shit. 

-Hey! You already started? – it was girls night, and she had completely forgot about Annie and Ruby coming to stay with her. Say that she wasn’t in the mood was an understatement. 

-Yeah… - she had poured the bourbon, had sit there only in her underwear with a thin robe looking at the glass for hours, deciding if she should or not. 

-Annie said she’s running late, and will come after she drops her kid. – Ruby was already pouring some bourbon too, getting the snacks on the top shelf while she still looked at the glass. – What? Something happened? – she shouldn’t be surprise that her friend could read her with just one look. 

-Rio is flipping his game… - and well, it was true, he was dropping them, her, to be exactly. 

-What do we have to do now? – Ruby was keen to anything involving him, and she understand that, after all she was married to a cop, she had her principles. 

-Nothing. – that glass wasn’t going to vanish and she wasn’t going to drink, so yes, it was time her eyes and mind focus on something else. - He’s letting us go, we paid everything. – the look she received was close to disbelief. 

-No more guns? Or treats? Or gangs on or necks? – she jus nodded, not that she was happy about it, quite the opposite, but her friend was, it was all over her face. – How did you do that? He was ready to kill you not long ago. – the suspicion wasn’t at bay. 

-I didn’t do anything. – and maybe that had been the problem, he expected so much of her, she knew, with the look he always gave her, the push he did, the things he made her do, and well she did a few and then she was blowing in fear and she was terrified, making things out of reaction. 

-So we’re free? Just like that? - there’s something there, something Beth isn’t saying, she didn’t know how things were between the two of them, it had became a topic they avoided, and the few things they knew were that everything was as okay as they could be. 

-Yep – she doubt that, at least for her, and it was a good thing, they could have a normal life again, making their things, working in a normal job, while still having the boland bubble to help them, but to her it was a different conversation. 

All her life she had been the good girl, the good sister, the good friend, the good wife and mother, and then shit hit the train, and it was crazy but, yes she had liked it, yes she had manage to know so much more of herself, so much more of who she was and what se wanted, that it wasn’t so hard for her to fall on all of that, on the proudest self she looked every day in the mirror since then, even if she was shitless scared of it, of what she had done to be there, at what she had forced herself to give up. It was some distorted year, but it was also the best she had in a long time until she took that gun and things started to go down the drain. 

-I don’t buy it… - it was never that simple with him, or her. – And i think there’s more to it, but if you don’t want to tell me i get it, and i’ll wait, but you don’t have to lie, not to me. – and she wanted, no she needed to share what was eating her up, but how could she tell her best friend she had gotten herself pregnant with the gangbanger child, how could she tell her he was in the hospital because she had put him there again, because he had never healed completely, how on earth should she do that? 

-I…

-Could that kid be more like me? He’s like to responsible for his own age… no fun. – and that was her cue to shut everything down and just enjoy the night, or at least try. 

It was good to have the girls when she didn’t have the kids, the house was to big, to devoid of noise. So Ruby had told Annie the news while she kept thinking of the funny of it all, and she just needed to laugh. First she had wanted, no, she had desperately tried with her dumb husband to have a kid and pass it like his, she was desperate not to die, not to get in the way of his hate and anger, and when she had given up on that just faking another thing, she had manage not so many months later, to be pregnant whit his kid, and now he didn’t even wanted to look at her face, so yeah, life was a fucking sick player.

\- You guys think we could make more money now? – and yes, they could, if she manage not to blow everything. 

-If we gave or other jobs, we could work in the boland bubbles and make more money. – Ruby said, it was a good idea, they needed to make thinks for themselves now, no other help. 

-Or we could open something? – she was thinking of a bakery for a few months now, she loved to bake and the girls did too, except for Annie, who could be in the front attending people.

-A hotel? – it was another idea, maybe i’m the future Annie, for now they had to stick to something they could manage. 

-A bakery. – she knew, that if things were going to be like she was imagining, she was going to be pretty busy, so it was an idea for now. - It’s something i always liked to do, and we can make some good money out of it, Ruby makes some good candy, and you can help with everything. – she had four kids to raise (it was five but she was ignoring it for now), and all the messy story to deal with, but with the help of the girls they could make it. 

-Yeah… I can see us with a bakery. – Ruby smiled, Beth was good with the money, and could make some delicious cupcakes and some good cakes, so yes, it was the best way to go. 

They had manage to stay in the topic, going between names for the bakery and organizing were it could be and who were going to start looking, and that had been the tricky one, because Ruby was still working in a caffe, and Annie couldn’t be part of that task, so she was the obvious choice, and the one that really hadn’t time for it, but still, it was on her, one more. And when Annie had one too many drinks Ruby had left with her to drop her home, not without pointing out the whole night her lack of drinks and the unfinished talk, and she muted a later with some good nights.

——————————————— 

It had been three days of consecutive coming and going of the waiting room outside of Rios bed. Mick wasn’t keen to see her there, and neither was Damon, she had to force herself inside, had to yell at them to let her pass and so they had, hating her a bit more, with looks that could get her killed faster than she could think. She didn’t enter his room, not anymore, she had had done to much damage already, had caused to many problems. But every day after closing Boland bubbles she drives forty minutes to sit there, waiting for him to be up and good again, for her courage to show, or maybe just to fell a tiny better with herself. 

Today was the fourth day, her kids were going to be back in morning, she wouldn’t be able to come here and, and wait. So she had sat on the chair right next to the door, she knew she looked like some crazy ex girlfriend, or some psycho, but she didn’t care, he was there and so was she. 

-You’re Elizabeth right? – it was his doctor, she often saw him there going in and out of the room. 

-Yes. – she smiled a little, she never asked him anything, she just knew from the looks the boys were if he was okay or things were not so good. - Is he… getting better? – she wanted to see him, more than she could hold. 

-Yes, we had a rough night, but everything is okay, he’s strong, and soon enough will be out and ready to run his business again. – that was surprise, the way he said business, like he knew what Rio did. 

-So… you are? – she asked, he was familiar. 

-Oh, i’m sorry, i’m Carlos, Rio’s brother in law, and doctor occasionally. – that was definitely new, Rio has a sister, old enough to be married, he has a family other than Rhea and Marcus, and she not once thought about that. - You’re his partner right? – she was still processing the fact that Rio had a sister. 

-Was, yes. – and the word was wrong on her on ears, she is his partner, she is his something. 

-I didn’t now he worked with suburban wife’s now, no offense. – she was offended, he had a face of a dick now that she was paying close attention. – Is that you’re not the type of people i see close of him. – and well she could see that, the hand he would always have with a doctor in the family, but still he was an asshole. 

-I’m not even married, and no offense but are you always this stupid? – she could hear the snort Damon gave looking at her. – It doesn’t matter who he works with, it’s not your place to know, your place is to make sure he stays alive. – now she could hear Damon laughing his ass of, while the man just looked at her with wide eyes.

-Yeah, i see why he works with you. – the man mumbled on his way out. What a stupid guy, who he thinks he is to make judgment on who Rio works with, and she was not just a suburban wife, she was much more. 

Damon just laughed his way to the room where Rio was, she knew she should try and talk to him, that it was time for her to boss up and get the courage to say everything. But she remained sitting looking at her hands ignoring. 

-Man that chick is crazy. – Rio was sitting at the bed, he was better, his lung healing and the bacterium was under control, so yeah, he was ready to get the hell out of there. – She just called Carlos on his bulshit. 

-Who? I said i didn’t want Rhea coming here every day with Marcus. – he was already pissed, that wasn’t a place for his kid, and they had to keep things in silent for now, not raising suspicions on why he was out the streets. 

-It’s not Rhea, it’s your girl. – Damon knew he was going to talk shit to him, but what could he do? Elizabeth was fucking crazy and he couldn’t shoot her, so yes she going to sit there for has long has she wanted. 

-My girl? What the fuck you talkin about? – there was only one person capable of talking shit to anyone, and he didn’t wanted to think it was her, because he had said, no he had yelled at them not to let her in. – Elizabeth? – and he just nodded, what the fuck was she doing there? Hadn’t she done enough? He didn’t want her pity, or her sorry, she wanted her has far away from him as possible. – Why did you let her in? I said i didn’t want her here! Why can you two do what i say? – he came to know from Carlos that there was a white lady sitting outside not two days ago. 

-That woman is fucking crazy, and you said we can’t shoot her so what is we supposed to do? – he still didn’t get what his boss saw in that white suburban mother, she had manage to stole his money, put him in jail and not so long ago shoot him, so he definitely needed to understand what was going on. 

-I don’t care what she is, i don’t want her he…

-You can’t just trow me away like that you know? – she was listening to the entire thing, he was an idiot, but he wasn’t going to just send her away. 

-Didn’t i do what you wanted? You’re free to do your business, do whatever you fucking want! – he didn’t get her, all this time she wanted him gone, wanted him out her life, her business, and when he finally gives her she keeps coming back. 

-No, it’s not what i want! – she wanted things how they were before, in the binging, they were partners, she wanted to work with him because he could be a lot of things, an asshole, an idiot, but he was a good partner, despite what they did, she liked to work with him, she just didn’t like the treats and the guns at face, and the anger they both put on each other. 

-I don’t get you… and i don’t give a shit anymore. – and he truly didn’t, he just wanted to move on with his life, stay has far away has he can. - You can leave now and do not come back again, or i swear i will tell Damon to shoot you. – and for the first time she could read him, could see exactly what the look on his face was, and it was pure disgust, he would shoot her if he could, and she knew that just with what he was letting her see. 

-You don’t kill something you love. – and even she was shocked with what had come out of her mouth, Dean was right, for the first time. And she could see his whole body shift in seconds, she didn’t knew what she was saying or telling him, because she was to lost felling her lower part, that was a great time to start his first moves hun? 

-Is that what you think? – and now he’s whole face was closed up, was like stone, he hated her, she could see, could sense, and she hated herself too, it was no surprise. So when she gave that first step in his direction and he came to an absolute stop she knew it was going to be hard but maybe worth it. 

-I know. – it came almost as a whisper, he was still looking at her face, looking to her blue eyes and that face of a fake angel. He didn’t even had time to process what was happening before his hand were being held by her and his eyes locked in hers, and when his eyes finally looked down seeing where they were going, he tried to push back she held it impossibly hard looking at him. 

-What you’re doing? – he was panicking a little, behind the cold look and harsh words, he didn’t trust her, not even with his hand. 

-You don’t kill something you love. – and he felt, her belly, her eyes watering, she was breathing so fast, like she was afraid of him, or afraid of what she was doing, and and what was that? He immediately looked at her, and she just smiled, he pressed more firmly felling it again, that couldn’t be, of course not, she was messing with him. 

And from there on he knew his life had turned upside down because of her, once more.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn’t going to do more chapters but i just couldn’t hold myself... Hope you guys like it.

Everything had changed, and nothing had changed. She had Mick on her watch all day, the kids were starting to get used to him being there, and so was she, Rio called every day and when she could she would see him, she would lay down on his bed, silent, him with his hands on her belly while she rested her head on his shoulder.

Rhea was right, at first he completely ignore her, and the fact that she had just told him he would be a father again. Anda he had asked for all kinds of exams even an DNA and by then she was beyond pissed at him, had said she would raise his kid alone, she didn’t need him, not to trow at her face once every 5 minutes what she had done and how that baby could not be his, so yes, she had gone home and not talked to him or came back there for almost a week, letting her kids keep her mind occupied.

And one day after dropping the kids at school she had come home to find Mick sitting on her kitchen counter holding a phone with him on the line, asking if they could talk, if she could see him, and if she was okay, if the baby was okay, and she had gone to him.

- _“ Aren’t you going to say anything?” – she was still standing by the door, ignoring his look, ignoring the felling in her chest, the one that always comes back when she sees him._

_-“ What do you want me to say? That i’m sorry? Well i’m not. – he was so full of shit, how could she still believe he was going to be any less than he’s usual self. – You lied to me more than i can count, i’m fucking stuck in this bed because of you. – and she knew all that already but it was all in the past, they have to move on. – So you think i would be happy? That i was going to believe you? You’re smarter than that. – and fuck if he wasn’t right, she was snake in his skin, sucking all his good sense, how could she just trow that at him? That she was expecting his kid and they would be a happy familie? When he was in the hospital because of her? Because she wanted him out of her life? Because she didn’t trusted him, and he was supposed to trust her._

_\- “I’m sorry for what i did. – for shooting him, she was trying to be better, to show him how much it ment for her, but she was not going to humiliate herself. – But i’m not sorry for wanting you away from me, you terrified me! Put a fucking bag in my head, than you started screaming and i just wanted it to stop, to make the fear stop, to make you stop. – her whole body felt fear, and she just got on full shock mode, she didn’t even remember what she had done after that firt shoot, she just remembers him lying there the blood on his shirt, the chocking sound he made._

_\- “So you shoot me because you were scared. – she just nodded, and he could see it, his men had done wrong dragging her that way, he wanted her scared but not of him. It was a fucking stupid night, and that was on him, but she still pulled the trigger. – And you still want me to raise this kid? Why? – she was a liar, that could be his, but who said she wasn’t going to vanish with it? That she really wanted him, and what he did close to them? Because that had been one of the problems with Rhea and the two woman were like sister when it came to their kids._

_\- “Because you’re the father. – (because i see you with Marcus and i know you would be just has great), she wanted to say, but that was enough for now. – Because i want him or her to have a Mommy and a Daddy, and a home, because i know that what happened between you and me there’s nothing to do with it, because in some point of it all, i... – ‘i wanted you’, and he knew what she was saying._

_And they had just stopped for some time, letting the words sink in while he stared at her and she stared at him, waiting. He knew she was going to be a good Momma, she already was, and he knew just how hard she had manage to hold that until now, so she didn’t need him, she had said that, and maybe it was better if she did it alone, he would give her money, he would give her the best for the kid, but he didn’t know if he could give himself._

_-“We both fucked up...and_

_\- “And you don’t want to do it... – she nodded taking some deep breath’s, she was going to do it alone. – It’s okay, i can..._

_-“No Elizabeth, that’s the problem, i want to, and i really shouldn’t, but i want this kid with you. – and she smiled, that big and beautiful smile, and that bright blue eyes_.

And that is how she’s currently almost falling sleep on the arms of the man she thought was going to kill her, in his bed, in his room, inside his house. It’s funny how life manages to always make his own wish, they still don’t talk a lot, and avoide every thing that has to be with how he is currently in there, but sometimes they talk about marcus, or her kids, and how Jane had been great at soccer practice and Emma being an identical copy of her, and Kenny getting better at math and Danny with his quite side, or they just stay there, felling each other’s warmth until she as to go.

-I’m getting out of bed rest tomorrow. – he says after some time lingering his hand on hers above her belly.

-You’re better? – she asks in that mama voice that makes him want to laugh. – You sure is okay for you? And you won’t be doing any business right? – he had to laugh a little popping himself on his good side to have a better look at her.

-Yeah, doctor said i’m healing good... no need to stay another day. – he was, and 2 weeks out the business even if he had Mick and Damon to take care of things it was still suspicious, and he needed to be back, was fucking tired of that bed. - I’ll have to go over the board. – and what? He didn’t even got of the hospital and was heading out?

\- No, you can’t, you’ll need to rest! – she got up sitting by his side, he was crazy if he thought she was going to agree with that.

\- Elizabeth, i already stayed in this fucking bed for two weeks, i have business to run, i have another kid to feed now. – he tried to make her smile only earning a serious look over.

\- Don’t make fun, and i know you have a lot of money already, so you don’t need to do this, we can keep washing through the Boland. – she didn’t wanted him going in business to possibly get hurt again.

-Nah, we not in business anymore. – and he was holding his ground, now better then ever, they needed a clean start, no business in the middle.

-Why not? I was thinking of opening a bakery with the girls, and it would be another place to go through. – she really wanted to open a new business, to do what she liked, and work with the girls on something that could also be legal.

\- I’m flipping my game, no funny money. – and that was surprise for her, he were already working on that for a few months, go through pills again, and then he could make something work in the legal business has well, invest in a few places, get him running a little more through detroit. – If you need help setting the place i can help, but we not partners anymore.

\- Why? We were good in it, we can make it work.

\- We will never be able to trust each other again, not in this at least, and i don’t want to come see my kid and fight with you just like we were fighting at work. – and yes she could see that happening, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t still try.

-But...

\- No, that’s not up for discussion, and neither is my trip. – she was up now, a little away from the bed, and he knew damn well how bad she took a no. - So you take care and run your things, i’ll let Damon with you, it won’t take a week and i’ll be back. – they were new at that thing they were doing, and neither one of them wanted to make things more difficult, they still had a lot to talk about, and when the time comes they would but now she had to make things his way.

\- Do you want to know? – yes she was angry, he wasn’t going to give her orders again, give her speeches and get his way on everything. And when his face was a mist of confusion and tiredness she continued. – The sex, my appointment is in three days. – and he was going to be traveling, hurting his not healed body. – I don’t want to, but if you want i’ll ask her.

\- Elizabeth... – fuck, he had forgot, and she was right to be pissed, he told her he was gonna be present, that he wanted to be involved in everything.

\- Do you want or not? Because if you don’t i’ll ask her not to say.

\- I want to, why don’t yo...

\- Because i wanted you to be there. – it wasn’t to inconvenient to ask for him to show up on her appointment, but she knew that when he left the hospital things were going to be different, she just expected him to be there with her. - But you won’t, so i’ll ask her and send a text to you. – she grabbed her purse not looking at him, she wanted this to be different, she didn’t need another Dean saying he’s going to be there or going to help and not even show up.

\- I’ll be there. – and she just laughed, she didn’t want anyone doing things out of obligation, she didn’t need pity, didn’t need help.

-No you won’t, and honestly you don’t need to. – she turned to him. – I just got my hopes to high, but it’s you, and it’s me, so who i’m kidding...

\- Don’t do this, i said i’ll be there. – he needed to do better, that had been his problem with Rhea, the work, the saying and not doing, and Elizabeth wasn’t wrong.

\- I don’t want you there anymore! – she shouted at him. – This was a big mistake, to believe that you could be a father to this child, who i’m kidding? We hate each other, you hate me, and you definitely don’t need to do this out of pity! I’ll do it myself like i always did, you don’t have to worrie i won’t be messing up with your plans. – and she was felling all her hormones at once flying through her body, cause she wanted to scream, to cry for being so stupid, they were never going to work, and that child was just going to suffer in the middle of the hate he put on her.

\- I don’t hate you. – and he didn’t, not anymore, not with her being there every day, caring his child, asking for forgiveness every week, he had blame on what happened too, and it was in the pass, it had to be. – And you ‘em’ gonna do anything alone, that’s my kid too, stop saying shit. – and he knew hormones could be crazy, but seeing her scream at him just to cry a second later did nothing good on him, he didn’t want her crying, ou doubting him, he was there and wasn’t going to leave. – I can push this trip, you want me there, i’ll be there. – and she just nodded, turning her face to take some deep breaths

\- That’s the problem, i don’t want you doing anything you don’t want, just because you feel obligated to do. – and she didn’t even realize how close he was already looking at him, they needed to be partners again, now more than ever.

\- Hey... i’m not. – he held her face between his hands, making her look at her eyes. - I’ll never do anything out of obligation for my Kid, or for you. – her gaze was so intense on her she couldn’t look away even if she wanted to, so she just kept staring, at his eyes brown and big and so soft she could almost mistake herself on who she was looking at. – We doing this together ‘yeah’. – his gaze kept driving back and forth from her eyes to her mouth and his hands touching her.

He had dreamed about that, his hands on her, or better on her neck, squeezing, making her breath catch, makings her eyes impossible big and wet with tears. And he was backing out, letting his hands fall, he didn’t trust them on her. He was going fucking crazy inside that room.

\- Yes. – she was lost, he was almost kissing her, and then he was backing like she had just burned him, like she was hurting him. – I... i have to go... you okay? – she didn’t have to go, but she needed, he was like cold water after almost burning, and that was maddening.

\- Text me the address and i’ll be there. – he had turned his back to her, closing his eyes to keep himself from reaching her again.

————————————

She had kept herself busy looking for a place to the bakery. Annie and Ruby still didn’t know about her pregnancy and she was having a really hard time keeping that from her two best friends, her kids were asking questions too, why was Mick or Damon always with them, they liked them, didn’t mind they were just curious.

After her appointment in the Monday, in witch Rio had come to her house and together for the first time they were seeing their kid, she couldn’t stop smiling, she loved every kid she had, and that one was no different. Rio was quiet, looking at her and the monitor, but after the heart beat filled the doctors room he smiled, giving a little nod to her.

- _“So you guys want to know the sex? – and they nodded at the same time._

_\- “Yes we do. – she smiled at him, it was good to have someone there, supporting her. After her first pregnancy Dean had vanished, never showing up to her appointments, showing little happiness to the girls or another boy, so she had begun to bring Annie or Ruby, but it wasn’t the same._

_\- “Well, let’s take a look then... – it was cold against her her lower belly, she kept looking at Rio, that bright eyes expectant at the monitor. – Mommy or dad have a preference? – she asked looking at her._

_\- “No. – they said looking at each other, they really didn’t, just wanted to be healthy._

_\- “It’s a little girl. – and she could swear that his smile got impossible big, a girl, a beautiful little girls just like her or Rio, she couldn’t be more happy._

_\- “A baby girl Rio. – she was laughing and crying._

_\- “She’s going to be beautiful just like her mama. – and she just had to kiss him, that overwhelmed felling pushing her foard. Lips touching ever so lightly, she could smell him, fell all of him._

_\- “I’ll let you put your clothes on, and we can talk about the next appointment and the plan you have for the delivery. – she left them alone, and they were more than happy in continue the kiss almost as instantly._

_They had settled for another appointment in two weeks, and then Rio had to leave, not without the two copies of the ultrasound he had insisted on having, but it was for the best, she haddad to talk about the delivery and the best option for her, that was a normal birth, if anything she would get a cesarean. And now she had to tell the girls, and the kids, and fuck, she had to tell Dean_.

Her house was a mess when the girls got there it had been a fell hours since her appointment, since she got to know the sex of her baby, the kids had done a pretty good job when she was out, turning the house apside down, she was running late on every thing.

\- Wow... what happened here? – and it had to be Annie and her big mouth.

\- You good? I’m good too Annie. – she faked a smile still getting the living room in place.

\- Yes Annie, help. – Ruby smiled at her going to help. – The kids? – she asked putting the toys away.

\- With Mick... i guess... or Damon... – she paused that was a good question, she had left the kids at school, gone to her appointment and Rio had said Mick was going to pick them and get some ice cream, giving her a break to talk to the girls. - It’s Mick, they are getting ice cream. – and she hadn’t even realized the girls were now just staring at her.

\- I’m sorry what? – and she turned to them almost laughing at the shocked faces.

\- You said he was gone! – it was valid for Ruby to bring it up, he was gone, and now he was never going to be again.

\- Yeah change of plans. – she smiled a little pointing to the couch, sitting on the other one.

\- I’m not getting it, are him treating you? There’s something going on?

\- Do we need to call the cops or the hitman thing again?

\- No!

\- Are him going to kill you? Kill us? I knew that talk about being done was all plan to get on us.

\- Guys no, stop, that’s not it. – she had to almost yell to make then listen to her. – No one is going to kill us, let alone him. – and the look of pure confusion was doing its job on making her laugh. – Everything is okay, Mick is taking care of the kids so we can talk... – she really should have recorded it.

\- Then what’s going on? We back in business with him? – Ruby was ready to leave, no business with that man again, she can’t do that again, she won’t do it.

\- No, we’re not. – she prepared herself, she had a lot explaining to do. – Rio was off business because he was hurt, he hadn’t healed completely from before... – and she expects the girls don’t ask what before was that. – And had to make a small surgery.

\- So he didn’t die? – Annie was still not getting much, she just hopes her sister don’t dies.

\- No, he didn’t die Annie. – she rolls her eyes continuing. – I stayed this two weeks there, in the nights when i didn’t had the kids. – and she knew the girls weren’t going to get it but it didn’t matter because now they were family.

\- And why exactly did you do that? – Ruby had said it was for the best, that he was gone, and it was, how could she not see that? Her best friend had gone crazy that was it.

\- Because i did it, i put him there, and i felt horrible, i still do. – they were never going to be able to understand what she had done, what she had gone through, that night, playing in her head all day, every day for the past months, and she had to swallow, she had to bury herself inside of that fake Beth that loved her husband and lived only for him and her kids, she was dead in the outside, until he came back, until he treated her and she believed she was alive again, that she was afraid to die, because it was him, and only him were capable of doing that, of saving her and destroying her at the same time. – Because i want him to be here. – and that was pretty much all it was.

\- So this is because you fell guilty? – Annie asked, she was shocked that for the first time it wasn’t her going crazy shit.

\- That too, but mostly because soon i’ll have five kids, and i want them all to have a father. – and she smiled, at the simultaneous look on Ruby and Annie faces. She got the tiny picture of she, her little baby girl, giving it to them.

\- You saying...?

\- I just hope she doesn’t come with his temper... – she joked smiling at them, she was happy and she hoped her sister and friend would be too.

\- Are you serious? – Annie asked in shock, looking at the ultrasound and her face. – You and gang friend? After everything? Shit you guys really wanted hun? – she laughed, her sister had proved herself to be a lot more crazy than her.

\- I’m in shock.

She had told them everything, since when she first thought she was pregnant through telling Rio and Rhea knowing, and they getting to the appointment today, and how supportive he was, and how he really wanted to do that with her, and all the fellings she was struggling to keep at bay.

\- I still can’t believe you didn’t say anything to us, you kept it for four months! – They were all at the same couch, Annie resting her head on her shoulder while she rested hers on Ruby.

\- I almost did, but i had to talk to him first... and them i would come running to you guys. – if the talk had been another with him, she knew how much she would need them.

\- And were is he? – that was another good question, he was probably going to canada now.

\- Business, out of town for a few days. – she had hated the idea, and still did, but he had said it was “gonna be fast mama” and she was against but what could she do.

\- And you two are together now? – Ruby asked, it wasn’t odd thinking it, but things were different now, and she understood that.

\- I... don’t know... – and she really didn’t, they hadn’t talk about them, and even if he slept every night by her side since he got out of the bed rest, with was already a few days, they hadn’t done anything other then kiss. – I guess we’re seeing were things go, i don’t want to mess everything. – she had to think on her kids, on herself, and maybe was best to keep things how they were now.

\- I’m sorry but after all you two had done to each other and are still both alive, there’s nothing to mess up anymore. – and she knew her friend could be right, but that didn’t prevent her from doubting herself still.

The girls had stayed until the kids were back, apparently Mick was the best human being in the word that day because he had let them do anything they wanted, and she has the trouble now with her with the amount of sugar that was possibly running in their tiny bodies.

\- Where’s Rio? He said he is going to watch Frozen 2 with me today. – Jane asked her, making a still there Annie look at her with judging eyes. Great he had probably forgot, and now it was her that had to watch Frozen 2 for the hundred time.

\- He had to make a quick trip Jane... by i can watch with you. – and that look in his daughters eyes was telling her different.

\- No, he said it was my night with him. – and the kids had been pretty possessive about him and his time, good help them, it didn’t have 2 weeks he was there and he was already the favorite.

\- I know baby, but he’s not here, so you can watch with mommy now, and when he’s back you can watch with him too. – she try’s seeing her baby girl nod running of the stairs probably to tell her sister about her time with Mommy.

\- God they are already that way with him? – she asked shaking her head.

\- Oh he’s the best, favorite on everything... i just make the food and keep them clean... all the fun now it’s with him. – she could be a little jealous? Probably. But she was happy they all gota long well, the talk she first had left then a little to shy around her, around him, but they just needed time, not even a week later since he first came they all liked him, and talked to him, even Danny the most shy of her crew.

\- Who’s the best? – she almost dropped her bowl, turning to see him standing there, in his hoodie and black jeans, just like he had left.

\- Not you. – she smiled, he had come back earlier, and not to his house, but to hers.

\- Uhun... – he smiled a little getting closer to drop a kiss to her forehead and then her lips it was a kick peak but all she needed. – You good? – he asked putting his hands on her middle.

\- Yeah. – she couldn’t stop smiling, she felt like a teenager again. – You came back early, everything okay? – he wasn’t supost to come until Friday.

\- Everything good mama, just finished early. – he said letting go of her turning to see a expectant Annie on the kitchen counter. – Yo... – was the only acknowledgment he gave her sister turning to her again. – I have to pick up Marcus, it’s okay if we came back here? Have dinner? – and it was the first time Marcas would be there, Rhea still didn’t like her, and after the busy weeks Rio had he didn’t got to be with him.

\- Sure, i’ll put another place for you two on the table. – she smiled, she was happy that he was there, with her, planning on being his kid. – The kids were asking for you, especially Jane and some Frozen 2. – he laughed shaking his head.

-Said i would watch it with her. – he got himself by her side letting her get back to her things.

-You have to stop making everything they want… specially Jane.

-Hellooo! I’m still here! – she shakes her hand in their faces making the look at her.

-And why is that?

-Rio! – he was good with her, but he knew he wasn’t going to be with the girls, because she was different had always been, and while they were getting well, there was still a lot to go through. – She’s just helping… don’t you have to go pick Marcus? – it’s best if he leaves soon, before the kids come running and he will be forced to make their wishes.

-Yeah, yeah. – he gives her tight a squeeze, leaving through the back door.

-Is this guy serious? – Annie and her outraged face was something she knew already. – You really need to give it to him….

-Annie! God. – her whole face was more red than the blouse Annie was wearing. - Isn’t time for you to go? – and she had asked for her help, but now that Rio had arrived it was no need anymore.

-Jeezz you two deserve each other. – she rolled her eyes making more drama. – You said i could stay! I’ll be alone home… pleaseeee.

-That was before i knew he was back… and really, i’m tired Annie… this kid is not helping in my case or your case, so i don’t need you two saying shit to one another. – and fuck wasn’t she tired, she was sleepless because of Rio being out of town and the baby almost dancing in her belly, her feet hurt, her back hurt, she wasn’t twenty anymore, and that was speaking volumes now.

-I’ll behave i swear! I can even do the dishes. – she smiled making that crazy face she knew best. – please, please, please.

-So can you please get the kids ready for dinner? – and she jumped so fast she almost missed her sister running to the stairs with the biggest smile on her face. – And you little girl need to help mommy too okay, stop making my belly your playground… behave. – she smiled felling her baby girl kick just like a little rebellious.

In less than an hour dinner was ready, and the kids were everywhere calling her and watching tv while Annie was setting the table.

-Miss Elizabeth… - the little boy was already running to her, hugging her legs in no time.

-Hi Marcus. – she smiled rubbing her hands through his hair. – Everything good? – she asked picking him up with the biggest disapproval look from Rio.

-He’s to heavy, come on… - he said shaking his head on his way to pick him from her.

-He’s not..

-Marcus! – from there on was scream after scream, Jane, Marcus and Emma hugging each and talking like best friends.

-You can’t pick them up, they are to heavy. – she just ignored him. - And why is your sister still here? – he asked helping her with the salad.

-Because i needed her help, stop being so crunchy. – he could be a pain in the ass sometimes. – How did it go there? – she was curious, he was back soon and in one peace so that was a good sine.

He had told her everything, who he was meting, Franco something he had an operation of passing stuffs through the board inside of imported wood and peace’s of furniture for houses and construction, how they were planing on do a test first before he settled for him, and how the man was not the trustworthy type, but he had to see how things were. And once sitting in the table they had gone to a more secured topic, talking about the kids and the things they had for school and their spare time how good they manage that, even saying a fell words to Annie who couldn’t even hide her big smile.

-Come on pop we have to go… - she wishes he could stay, and she knows he wishes that too, but after everything that has happened it’s good for him and for Marcus to stay a little while alone, just the two of them.

-But daddy…. We just stared Frozen 2! – his face was the cutest, she couldn’t take that kid, imagine that little girl in her belly looking just like her brother, she would be the death of her.


End file.
